Thursday, April 18, 2013

See No More

I know I'm usually really goofy on this blog, but I'd like to use this space today to talk about something that's really been getting my goat lately. I'll talk about Married to Medicine and my summer clothing pet peeves another day. Let's turn down the goofy dial about 30% here. 70% Serious talk time.


I don't like them. I also dislike bullies.
When, oh when did I become Cady Heron?
This marvelously artistic, emotional, symbolic, and beautiful music video is my inspiration for this post. You all know how much I love music videos! (I am majoring in film this fall, after all!) This song summarizes exactly how I feel about posers and bullies.  I want you to watch Joe Jonas get all upset and burn down some house or something, and let it all soak in.

Done watching? Okay. Let me explain. It's April already! Yay! I've chosen a college! I met a bunch of hilarious, kind, interesting people from said college! Graduation is around the corner! I'm nearly eighteen! Senior prom is in three weeks! Huzzah!

Yay me!
Whoa, I'm even wearing Abigail Breslin's glasses!
But push all of that wonderfulness aside for a second. School has been pretty wild lately. The approaching end of high school is making everyone loopy! Where everyone = the kids in my art class. Every other class of mine is like another, saner dimension! We get candy in AP Biology! We sing "Thrift Shop" in AP English! Why is AP Art my least favorite class? I AM AN ARTIST FOR PETE'S SAKE. Hence the "seeing no more" motif I'm going for here. I'm an artist, and I know many artists. Real artists and high-school artists can be two very different groups of people. Real artists are aware of deadlines, work hard, support one another, and strive to grow and learn. High school artists can't take criticism, spend entire class periods socializing and distracting others from working, think they're God's Gift to Mankind, and are in for QUITE the reality-check after graduation! I'm NOT saying that every artist who is still in high school falls into that second category, because many of us teenage art kids are TOTAL AWESOME-SAUCE. Hello, everyone who's attending art school with me in the fall! You all are total diamond-shining-stars. All of you wonders continue on your merry way. Nothing to see here!

I'm talking about the posers in high school with me right now. Ah, now you get where I'm coming from! My school has a really big art department, which means there's plenty of room for posers and the like. I think high school cliques have to be large in order to have posers at all. In order for a poser to be a poser, they must have something to pose off of, am I right? You don't have to be an art kid to get what I'm saying here. A poser could be that girl on the cheer-leading squad who never does any actual cheer-leading, but just sits on the bench Instagram-ing and talking about how skinny and popular she is. A poser could be a computer geek who knows nothing about actual computers but goes to computer club meetings anyway so they can humble-brag about their 5 Mac computers and Ray Ban glasses. 

(MAJOR HINT TIME: No true computer-geek/programmer/gamer/hacker will EVER humble-brag about having a Mac over a Windows computer. EVER.)

And a lot of these posers used to be awesome people. They claim they've "grown up," and were unpopular and even "depressed" back when they were actually nice and cool. Okay? What does that make me, when we were friends?
At least then they were real!
The point is, posers aren't only annoying - they're damaging! They distract the people they're posing off of from getting any actual work done! The cheer-leaders can't cheer-lead properly, and the computer club can't compute without being interrupted by humble-brags! In my case, the artist-posers are such a frustration. Out of my school's Art Kids, I'm pretty friendly with all of them. But there are a select few who I just can't handle. Not only are they posers, they're bullies. They ignore me when I talk to them, think they're better than me, and exclude me from all art-club-related decisions. The Queen Bee of the group makes it her personal business to make sure I feel like a tiny little speck of dust that no one can see. Being ignored is like TORTURE. It hurts, because I've done nothing wrong. I've been nothing but nice! I've invited them out after school and complimented their artwork! I GAVE A HERSHEY'S KISS TO EVERY ONE OF THEM TO TRY AND CHANGE THEIR OPINION OF ME ON VALENTINE'S DAY! I've spent countless art periods hiding and working in another art classroom, near-tears venting to my guidance counselor and to my best friend at lunch, and bringing non-art-kids into my classroom to act as a shield against all of the awful-ness.  "Why don't they like me?" was a question that ran through my head ever minute of every art class. I'm one of those Awful People who is nice to those who are mean to me, so none of them have any idea how much their behavior gets to me.

*sigh* How do I not fit in with the art kids, when I am an artist myself?
Then I had an Epic Epiphany.

I just realized how much I dislike this group of people! I don't need to put up with them any longer! I don't need to prove anything to them! It's hard to swallow the fact that a whole group of your friends (Don't worry - I have other groups of friends! If you're reading this, you know who you are!) is a bad influence, but it can happen. It's especially apparent after you start to meet people outside of your social circle, such as from your future college (shout-out #1.259,823,924)! Your current high-school "friends'" bull crap becomes as clear as day once you've waded out of it.

Me and my best (non-artistic) friend were stuck in the nurse's office at school recently for an hour and a half during an extended lock-out, which was caused by the brilliant antics of my fellow brilliant classmates, when we started talking with the kids who were locked in with us. It was wonderful and just like those movies when everyone goes around taking turns telling their life stories. Anyway, I found out that I'm not the only one who thinks these art kids are irritating! Apparently it's a widespread opinion at my school. Most of my friends don't go to my school, and the ones that do are far-removed from my art class, so for a while this year I was oblivious to how my art class looked to the rest of the world, without any outside perspectives. But I feel validated! They are actually all jerks! And everyone knows it!
 I am always the last one in on things around here!

But what do I do now? My school recently passed a law banning iPods, so I can't tune them all out with my stunning musical tastes. Our AP Art portfolios are due in 3 weeks, so there is ZERO time for lollygagging and socializing!  I need a 5/5 on my portfolio!I NEED TO GET STUFF DONE. WHAT DO I DOOOoooo?

WARNING: If you ever see a horde of Doc Martens, undercuts, beanies, hair dye, peace signs, gauges, Ray Bans, ironic t-shirts, and DSLRs all in one place at one time, you've accidentally wandered into the scary part of my high school's art department, and you need to TURN AROUND IMMEDIATELY AND RUN AWAY AS FAST AS YOU CAN SCREAMING UNTIL YOU HIT THE TRAIN STATION OR IHOP OR SOME OTHER PLACE THAT IS NOT MY HIGH SCHOOL.

My saving grace is art college next year. The key difference between the posers I know now and the artists I've met so far from college is artistic drive. They're passionate about art like I am!

Hence my musical choice for this post: I can't wait for college! I really don't want to see any of these bullies while I'm trying to finish my portfolio. I can never concentrate while I'm in that class, and it's like a vortex of negativity for me! All they ever do is gab about their epic plans which I'm never invited to, play really irritating indie music, and pass food around, again forgetting to pass any to me. When did art class become about everything but making art?

My sentiments exactly, Cher.
If any of you readers out there have a group of "friends" who perpetually treat you this way, please stand up for yourself. I know it's easier said than done, but it's currently at the top of my to-do list! I'm trying to be a better feminist/kick-butt crime-fighter/Mean-Girls-era-Lizzy-Caplan, but it's tough. Smudgy, angsty eye-liner looks like crayon on me, and my angsty pin-collection is not nearly close enough to being finished.

How I wish I was in real life!
It's Saturday now, and this Epic Epiphany occurred yesterday, on Friday during school. I have twenty-four hours to come up with a good reason as to why I'll be sitting ALLLLL the way across the room in art class, maybe with a blanket covering my entire body, and maybe also under a desk on Monday. Wish me luck, kiddies. How do you deal with posers/bullies? I read an article in Oprah Magazine about not being a doormat to bullies and jerks. (My Mom got a free subscription, but I begged her to keep it active because Oprah is actually awesome, so stop judging me already.)
Well said, Josh. Well said.
The article said to write out a list of things you want to do, and then to go ahead and do them, in a specifically open-minded, respectful, yet assertive manner. Apparently, most bullies will back down when they know they're in the wrong and are called out on it. Let's hope Oprah's right on that one!

Don't be a doormat like me, cupcakes! Be a Lizzy Caplan!